


ot5 Kills Grimmy: SVU

by coloured



Category: Elliot Stabler - Fandom, Law & Order: SVU, One Direction (Band), nick grimshaw - Fandom
Genre: Law and order svu smut, M/M, Multi, This is a crack fic, crack!fic, good part is the epilouge, larry - Freeform, side zouis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-03
Updated: 2014-07-03
Packaged: 2018-02-07 06:36:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1888653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coloured/pseuds/coloured
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a crack fic, Gryles is trash and so am I. But I had an impulse to make Louis and Elliot make. I've watched 5 seasons of SVU within a week and Stabler can fuck my ass anyday. So yeah the boys kill Grimmy and Louis is interrogated by Elliot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	ot5 Kills Grimmy: SVU

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on twitter @royalestyles

"Harry, no!" I seethed, so close to strangling him that even Niall noticed. (Niall was a bit challenged.)  
"You fucking retard," Zayn spit tobacco chew onto Harry's head, which was currently buried in Nick Grimshaw's ass. He claimed Nick had stuck his mother's wedding ring up his asshole. Harry needed the money to pay back Ben Winston for 'their nights together in Bali'.  
We all know that means that Harry was getting fucked up the ass by Ben's four-inch.  
After the ring was retrieved from Nick's ass, Harry had the audacity to ask why we told him to stop.  
"Harry, when the cops find Nick's body, your DNA will literally be in his asshole," I lifted a brow at him. I don't think he understood what this meant.  
"Since you're too retarded to infer what we told you, I rephrase. Zayn and I shot him. But you stuck your face in his ass. So now Nick's body is covered with your shit."  
"Okay."  
Harry stood up as Liam packed the camera.  
"Can you send me the video as soon possible?" Niall turned to me when Liam handed me the tape, biting his bottom lizard lip.  
"Why would I do that?" I eyed him.  
"Because I have the-"  
"Shut the fuck up, Mr. Incest," I glared at him, remembering the incredibly disturbing image of Greg Horan in a lace thong.  
"We're ready to go guys, Harry," Liam said, watching Harry's shoulders sag at the last part.  
"Louis, Liam is making fun of me again," he pouts, resting his chin on the strap of my backpack.  
"Harry, get the fuck off me."  
As Harry trails behind me like an autistic golden retriever, Zayn shoots Nick one last time for good measure.  
Liam shakes.  
Harry barks.

The next morning, I awake to the hum a siren and fluorescent lights. Fuck. We're done.  
My door kicks in, and a cop the spitting image of a white Mel Gibson circa 1989 holds a gun to my face.  
"Good morning, officer prick. Before you charge me with murder I'd like to get dressed, unless you want me to go to court in my proper birthday suit," I grimaced.  
"Elliot Stabler. I'm not an officer. But I am a prick. Dress yourself."  
I shrug and get out of bed, exposing my junk to pretty eyes.  
"Unfortunately for you, I don't want to see the one inch wonder, Tomlinson."  
"Well, Stabler, unfortunately for you, I don't like it up the ass," I threw on a shirt over my sweats.  
"We both know that's bullshit. Your DNA is all over Mr. Grimshaw's body. And you're wearing suspenders in that picture," he laughed and cuffed me, to my surprise.  
"You're under arrest for the menacing of a Detective, as well as the murder and possible sexual assault of Nicholas Grimshaw. You have the right to remain silent, an attorney-"  
"What the fuck? The menacing? All I did was show you my dick and call you Mel Gibson," I groaned.  
"You never called me Mel Gib- why- fuck it. Get in the squad car. We need you to answer some questions," Elliot leads me out the front door, but quickly frees me when he sees Zayn running in nothing but socks over the fence.  
He barrels himself over and tackles Zayn within seconds.  
Zayn throws a punch but Elliot backs him onto the grass and throws a few rounds in the nose as well as a knee.  
Right in the eggs.

At the station I pass Harry, who's shaven only half of his hairless skin, who's also crying into the alleged captain's chest, who (the captain) looks like he's contemplating suicide.  
Niall is getting beaten up by some guy in the cell, who's probably 6'10 and high off bath salts. I'm not planning his funeral if he dies. I guilted Liam into planning all our funerals if any of us died about a year ago.  
Stabler shoves me into a room with nothing but a metal table and two chairs.  
"So you're going to interrogate me?" I asked, blowing dust off my fingertips.  
He slams his fist on the table.  
I need a new underwear.  
"Why did you do it, Louis?" he challenges, squinting at me.  
"Kill Nick? I wanted to. I hate the bastard. He looks like a fucking salad and he deserved to die when he swallowed glass. What fucking idiot swallows glass? One who should die," I stated, meeting Elliot's eyes.  
"We both know that's not true."  
"Oh, but it is," I trail, winking at him.  
He grabs me by the hem of my shirt and shoves me against the wall. Now I need new pants.  
"Was he fucking you? Did he leave you for someone else? Harry?" he smirks at me, and I can feel my heart racing faster than Liam waddles when he sees the ice cream truck.  
"No."  
"Well then what, Louis? Enlighten me. Because we found your semen on him as well as Harry's saliva. Pretty fucked up," he narrows his eyes again, not letting me down from the wall.  
"Fuck. Fine. I had sex with Nick to stop him from fucking Harry. But he didn't stop. So I got Zayn to help me kill him. Then Zayn told hunty, also known as Liam, and with Liam comes Niall's mentally unstable ass, as well as Harry. Them three live together. Liam keeps an eye on Niall so Niall doesn't eat a blender. Harry's their lap dog," I confessed, relieved that he let me go from the wall.  
"You love Harry, so you kill the thing that keeps you from him. Nick. Am I right?" he keeps going, circling me in the chair and then sitting down.  
"I plead the fifth," I spit. I don't love Harry.  
"Nope. You murdered someone. Confess your motive."  
"I plead the fifth."  
"Say it, Tomlinson."  
"No."  
"Say it, Louis," Elliot yells, sweat and veins apparent on his forehead.  
"No," I manage to squeak out.  
"Say it." He shouts, blasting my eardrums.  
"The fifth." I feel heat behind my eyes.  
"Say it." He whispers into my left ear, a menacing tone.  
"I love Harry so I killed Nick," I mumble.  
"Louder," Stabler reprimands.  
"I love Harry so I killed Nick," I cry, throwing my face in my hands.  
"I always knew you took it up the ass," he walks out of the room.

Epilouge:  
I went to federal prison for the murder of Nick Grimshaw with Zayn.  
Harry ended up in a mental institution for undiagnosed dangerous habits (meaning he was so stupid he could light himself on fire and never know until he saw God himself), and Niall and Liam were innocent.  
Rumor had it that Niall died eating a blender and Liam killed himself from guilt.  
I fucked Elliot Stabler after my sentencing in the court bathroom, he topped. I wasn't surprised.  
Zayn and I ended up getting married by a homophobic officer who kept throwing in some promotional speech about the Westboro Baptist Church before our vows. Zayn's vows, although meaningful, ended with 'no homo'. So did mine.  
Rumor also had it that Harry tried to marry his rocking horse in the home. Apparently, when the nurse told him he couldn't marry the wooden piece of shit, he went into an epileptic seizure which brought him into a coma.  
Just the way he should die. Induced seizure by the illegality of marriage to an inanimate object.

The end.


End file.
